A Mystical Journey

India. A country that has a veil of mystery. I've never been there, but heard much about it. What to expect? I don't know, and I love that I don't. I do know, that I'm going to love it! Sometimes people ask me: "How do you know if you're going to like something or not?", and the answer is simple; liking or disliking is nothing more than an attitude. Were there things that you used to hate, but now like, or the other way around? Of course there were, and if not than you should try some new things.

I'm leaving in a few hours already! First to Frankfurt, because tomorrow I have an early flight, and I wouldn't be able to make the plane if I were to leave tomorrow morning. I will leave my laptop in a locker at the airport, because I've been adviced not to take too many valuables with me. Also, I'm gonna travel with a light suitcase, cause I don't want to be fully packed when I can buy cheap clothes there!

I will be doing some amazing courses, together with hundreds of young people from around the world. For sure it's gonna be one big bubbling party full of madness. Madness? This is Art of Living!

Also important to know is the temperature; I feel for you guys all cold in the snow and rain! We'll see what happens, but I know I'm gonna love it.

India, here I come!

Walking in Grace

Goodness, my children, so much has happened in the past few weeks. In all the chaos I couldn't find time to easily sit my ass down and let my thoughts gently touch the keyboard. But right now I'm in a haven of peace, a place where I can always go, always able to return to; a place I call home. Here I can write in peace.

A lot of things happened lately; I first went to Bad Antogast, then I went to Holland to pick up Iva at the airport, and then we had a great time visiting my friends and family in Holland. It was really amazing and I'm really happy that she came to visit me here. It was a shame that the christmas dinner I was so much looking forward to, was cancelled due to bad weather, but there wasn't anything we could do about it.

I mean, what to do about the weather? Not worth getting upset about. Iva thought differently; she was very annoyed by the incompetence of the Dutch railways. And yes, the dutch railways weren't doing much of a good job as usually. At least they didn't check for tickets, so we didn't have to pay the ridiculously overpriced travel fees. You would think that our high tech trains can handle a bit of snow, but it seems that the more advanced the technology gets, the more sensitive it gets to environmental changes as well.

But enough about that, it's not worth typing about. What is worth typing about, is how much I love Iva. I feel so fulfilled with her, she's a really nice kitty girl to care for. It was strange to see her leave again today; one moment she's in your arms, the next moment she's on her way home, 1000 miles away from you. It's tough to switch back to separation, especially after only a week. I can't wait to start something new with her when I'm done with the YWC program!

So what will that be? We've been thinking about Amsterdam; I can get us a place to live, make some money, and make music, while she finishes her study. But she's also looking into her New York thing. I don't know if I can follow her all the way into Manhattan if she decides to go there soon, but we'll see. You never know what's in store for you. There's always a plan, you'll encounter something sooner or later that points you into the right direction. You just gotta dare to make a leap of faith. Does that mean I should move to NYC with her? Or does it mean that would just be the crossroads where our ways will part?

I have no idea, but I hope I'll be able to enjoy her for some more time. I aint worried though; no reason to do so at all. Just be grateful for what you got, for you're walking in grace anyway. Spoiled people fail to see the beauty in their lives, instead they complain about what they don't have. Is that worth stressing yourself over? What if you could change your whole world just by changing yourself? It would be a most efficient way of living. All you have to do, is to be honest with yourself. Feeding other people shit is business and politics, but feeding yourself shit is just plain stupid.

Eat fresh, be fresh.

P.S. and a big thanks to all my homies who were there to meet my lovely girl; don't worry, I'll bring her back again someday!

Frischkase

Few things I love more than a nice german bread with seeds in it, that I cut in nice slices, and then put cream cheese on it with some chunky chat masala. It's the golden find for me; I could eat a whole bread like that in one go, it's just that delicious.

Today I was given a choice, a tough one. It's funny that sometimes choices seem hard at first, but they end up being easy, whereas now the choice seemed easy, but it ended up being hard. So let me explain...

As you know I've been traveling around a lot lately, but not for Art of Living. I always seem to manage myself into some exceptional status in which I can do whatever I want. It must be some kind of gift, but at the same time it's a weakness, because it lets me stay in my comfort zone whereas, others would've gotten pulled out already. So I would say: Use with caution.

So Katya, manager of YWC, sent me an email the other day telling me I should come back to BA to help with christmas preparations there. I replied that it would have little use since I'm going back to Holland in a few days. Then she said that I was doing all these things aside from YWC, and she was asking me if I still consider myself to be in YWC. It's not like she told me what to do, she just wanted me to make up my mind; you're either on the team, or you're off the team.

At first the choice seemed logical; if I can't do what I want, then I'll be off the team. But as time passed, it became evident to me that I would have to stay, for it was in my best interest. I was imagining how it would be if I were to stay on YWC, because the only reason why I make my own plans is because of Iva. Other than that I really don't care; they can send me where ever they want. Then I thought of leaving YWC, so going to the winterbreak in a few weeks, then coming back home, finding a job, and plan my next trip. As I thought of this I observed that my energy immediately went down; deep in my heart, I wanted to stay.

So the decision was made, now it was to deal with the consequences. What if I wouldn't be able to come back to Holland on the 16th, but a few days later? Would I tell Iva to cancel her flights? I already pulled that on her once, and I knew a second time could really be a crack on our relationship. Not on my side, because I don't really mind; I love her anyway. So I decided to use my diplomatic skills to see if I can get a compromise, but even if not I'd accept it. And it passed as said above; I get to go back to Holland on the 16th, but after that it's YWC all the way. Yes m'am! So I saved myself out of my own shit once again, but I went with caution. This is the way.

Besides, ever since I finished high school I've started studies without finishing them. I feel that I need to finish this, and when I do, then I'll feel good and I'll be able to start the next chapter with full enthousiasm. And I already know what that will be, but until that time I'll be completely focused on this. I remember Rajshree saying that we get strength from following through on our commitments, I even remember some of my own lyrics saying "if you don't go all the way it aint worth it", and that's a righteous truth right there.

My perception and judgment crystal clear from the Frischkase, as Camille said. And yes my French friend; it's definitely a good decision. Socratez is gonna rock your world!

Fix the Misery

I just saw the worst movie ever. Worst as in that it gave me the worst feeling I've ever felt while watching a movie. It's pretty well done, but it was full of misery. In the beginning there's actually a point that it seems to be nice, but then it drops, and it drops hard, and it keeps on dropping. It drops so deep, that at a certain moment you fail to see any chance for redemption; I suppose hope dies last.

I also saw other interesting things today; a presentation about the Venus Project, now that shit is interesting. I had already seen Zeitgeist: Addendum, but I didn't see this presentation. You can see it here, but I would suggest you see Zeitgeist first. Simply because a lot of things may be very shocking if you're not familiar with the background of the monetary system. But if you got a strong stomach and open mind, I suppose it's worth watching.

In the end it's about consciousness, that's probably why Requiem for a Dream was so intense for me. The worst thing is that it's probably not that fictional. So what's your fix?

Rocking with Attitude

If the wall hadn't fallen in '89, it definitely would've fallen now. Ladies and gentlemen, we're rocking Berlin! It's only been 2 days since me and Konstantinos abandoned fundraising and started focusing on the course, but it feels like much longer. Like I argued in my last post, I believe that we're here to give people courses, not to raise money. While Plakor and Camille are fundraising, me and Kostas are visiting the universities.

So why are we rocking Berlin? Well, it just feels good. It's not that we have 30 registrations, but we're making all the right connections at the moment, which will pay off for sure. But what is so interesting about all this, is that it's taking no effort at all! Everything we did in the last 2 days just seemed to happen to us by accident. Of course there is no such thing as a coincidence, but I'm just emphasizing how easy everything went.

And with everything I really do mean everything. From the first moment we set foot inside the university we were guided from one place to another. Every person we talked to had some function to fulfill. The big difference with what we usually do, is that we usually go there trying to hand out as many flyers as possible and doing as many introtalks as possible, preferably to as many people as possible. In short; we're trying to reach as many people as possible, but in the proces we forget to actually connect to them.

How to connect? Simple; be genuinely interested in people and what they're doing. We actually went to this anti-racism class the other day in which the participants were discussing how they could stop the upcoming facist march which will take place in Dresden somewhere in februari. Of course my name wouldn't be Steven, if I wouldn't speak my opinion about what they're trying to do. It is unimportant for the point I'm making right now, but for the sake of the possibility that you might actually learn something from it, I will still shortly explain my views on anti-demonstration demonstrations.

To demonstrate against demonstrators; sounds a bit strange doesn't it. I would say, first off, I sincerely believe that everyone should have the right to be wrong. I'm not saying racism is wrong because I don't like to judge, I would say it's a state of consciousness, and a quite superficial one, but out of principle I wouldn't say it's wrong. But that's just me; I bet there's plenty of people who would say it's wrong, and that's fine too, but let others then have the right to be wrong! I asked them the difference between intolerance towards skin colour or sexuality, or intolerance against an idea; it's the same fucking thing. People then argued that this is different, because facism is a movement of which people become victims each year. True, but would an anti-movement not be the same thing? And would this movement not end up being violent? Of course it would; it's very naive to think that you would be any different from them, if you go down the same path.

I continued with telling them that if they want to show them to be tolerant, they should be tolerant themselves. And if they want them to be loving, then be loving yourself; be the change you want to see in the world, signed Gandhi, one of the biggest revolutionaries of all time. Anyone can go down the simple short-sighted path of intolerance and violence, but that's never going to solve anything. If you think you're a smart intellectual, then act like one; you know better than what you're doing.

People were shocked by my criticism, and they definitely did not agree, but I do think it shook them a little bit which is good; it makes people think and reflect. If you want to help people, you need to be ready to criticize; not being the nice guy who's afraid that you might hurt someone's feelings. No, you do what needs to be done. This is what is essentially means to be a tool of the divine. Now I'm not saying I perceive myself as such, although I do wish to fulfill that role one day, but during these 2 days I definitely felt a big force working around us. We're definitely not alone; we get support from all sides.

When the day is over and we leave the university, we feel really uplifted; not tired at all. The key to success is attitude. Rememeber it; attitude.

The Money Machine

Fundraising is a curious subject of discussion.
I'm talking about NGO's getting money from third parties in order to finance their projects. These projects often involve third world countries, or whatever we call them today or tomorrow; to help those people, so they get food and water, or shelter. Now don't get me wrong, I think it's a very just and noble cause to help those in need, but there are some things that are not adding up.

First of all, let's just simply look at the results; they're minimal. What did we ever change in the under developed countries? Sure we built some homes, sure we gave people food and water, but did poverty decrease ever since we started our welfare projects? They didn't. I'm definitely not doubting our projects, but what I am doubting is the system that we're living in.

Capitalism in its current form will always make the wealthy wealthier, and the poor poorer. So out of all the wealth that we suck out of those countries, our corporations give back a little bit to charity to clean their conscience. The dirty businessmen get filthy rich in the mean time. So why would we be doing this? It's like wiping the floor while the sink is still running, or however you say that in English. What I'm saying is; the work we do isn't really solving anything. In fact, we're actually supporting the system that's making this happen. I could even say that the fact that there are NGO's is an inevitable side product of an unfair economy.

Now you might not agree on those last few things, but I don't fucking care. Fact is that poverty has only increased in the last, let's say 30 years. Our policies never brought any peace, instead they brought war. Our invented money machine is ruling the world, and it has enslaved us as well. So why are we fundraising? Because we're told to do so. The only solution I see to the world's problems, is to radically change the system, to create a new world. And I think spirituality is vital if people want to be able to adapt to something new, because it's the fear of death that makes them cling to our invented reality. Fear that they wouldn't be able to survive without it.

This is where spirituality comes in. With love, there can be no fear. Love and fear are in fact the same energy, but manifest in different ways. It's about elevating to the next level, so we can elevate society as a whole. So in order to fix this world, we have to fix society, and this doesn't happen with fundraising, but by showing people who they really are.

The only good thing that I can say about fundraising is that it's a good personal training; making the right connections, networking so to say. Other than that, fuck it, but I'm stuck with it for now anyway. Hopefully in Hamburg things will be different, but even if they aren't, I'll be home before I know it, and then I'll start a new chapter of my life.